While the definition of success is relative, there is one common thread in all of those definitions: a goal.
Goals can be:
- raise mindful children to become well-adjusted adults
- create a home environment where each family wants to come home to
- become a leader in your field
- make X amount of money in X years
- reach a certain position at work within X years
Whatever your definition of success is, you need to have certain habits that will take you to the realization of your goals. With many pieces written about habits of successful people, I’d like to go the opposite route and look at habits that keep you from being successful.
Perhaps you’ll realize you have some of these habits. That’s the first step toward getting rid of them and a step toward your goal as well.
Here are 6 habits that keep you from success.
1. Winging it
Some people seem to have that innate talent that allows them to go through life without planning a thing. Whether that’s luck or they actually do plan without revealing or realizing it, we don’t know. What we do know is that most of the time, if you go through your day, week, month, or year without having a plan – even a sketchy one – you’ll probably end up not reaching your goals, leaving one frustrated you.
Don’t wing it. Set your main goals then create smaller goals that you can reach in shorter timeframes. This will allow you to feel a sense of achievement each time you reach a small goal, propelling you closer to success.
2. Spending too much time on “timesinks”
With the world available at our fingertips, thanks to the internet, timesinks are everywhere. We can even justify them as part of work.
Let’s do a bit of accounting. Ask yourself the following questions.
- What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
- What’s the first thing you do when you go online?
- Is your Facebook/Twitter tab open the whole day?
- How much time do you estimate you spend on social media?
- How much time do you spend chatting with friends online?
While these activities can be fruitful and even necessary, getting too attached will derail you from your road to success.
Don’t get addicted. Stay away from temptation and set rules regarding your online usage. You can start by implementing a “don’t reach for the phone and check email/Facebook first thing in the morning” rule.
3. Worrying too much
Worrying about your family’s welfare, your job, and other responsibilities is normal. Wallowing in those worries is not.
[tweetthis url=”https://www.thedailymind.com/success/habits-that-keep-you-from-being-successful/”]“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.” – Erma Bombeck[/tweetthis]
If you stay in that rocking chair, you’ll get nowhere close to your goal.
Are you a worrywart? (I am.) Read this article to help deal with that.
4. Focusing on others’ progress
Keeping up with the Joneses. We know how that goes.
Your friends just got a car? Why not take out a loan so you can be like them?
Your colleague just got a promotion? Worry yourself to death by thinking of how you can outdo him.
Keep doing these things, and before you know it, everyone else has moved on, and you’re still stuck where you’ve always been.
If you want to progress, focus on yourself, what you’re doing, and how you can be better. Try to ignore how others around you are becoming successful. That’s their business. You have your own goals to reach.
5. Allowing draining people to stay in their lives
Some people are simply draining to be around. You may love them to death, but when you’re around them, you feel like your life essence is slowly leaking out, leaving you tired and depressed.
The best thing to do is to stop hanging out with these people, but if you can’t, then limit the time spent with them so you can prepare yourself. Learn how to deal with energy vampires in your life in this article.
6. Putting themselves last
So many people are relying on me. That is one of the reasons I need to be successful. I need to provide for my family. I need to prove that I am capable of doing this and that.
The list goes on and on.
But, where are you in that priority list? When was the last time you did something that was for yourself, something you actually wanted to do without thinking of others?
If you can’t remember, or if it’s a year – or months – ago, it’s time to think.
STOP. Stop giving and giving, and putting everyone’s needs ahead of yours.
It’s okay to be selfish sometimes. You need to take care of yourself so you can take care of others.
If you want to be a success, make sure you have the energy and emotional health to get you there.
Back to you
What habits above do you have if any? How do you think you can change them?
Are there any habits that keep you from being successful that I missed? Let me know so I can add them and help others more.